Tuesday, December 02, 2008

"what do i want? a best friend i'm in love with"

this song makes me realize how romantic the idea of a person can seem when you're alone. plus it's so twee, which makes it all the more melancholy.

i'm not alone.. and it's pretty fun most of the time. i have to think about it more to appreciate what i have, but i'm working on that. and manage myself the times i am being driven crazy. or am doing the driving. haha.

i used to think i was a good and patient person.. not anymore. can't fool myself anymore. last year's events twisted me and turned me the opposite, sad to say. i became unbending because i bent too much. messed up. anyway, i guess i am only starting now to learn about love. i don't understand how to receive it, even after all these years. and how to give it? clueless and bumbling. what does it mean to have it? geez i really do hope i grow up soon, for the sake of everyone around me. sometimes i see things how they really are and am shocked at how b even puts up with me so much. unbelievable!


Boydknife said...

aw bomps. love you.

kristi said...

what ABOUT last year? was it that soon ago? assuming youre talking about all the hoopla

Fern said...